Smart Ass Cripple

Expressing pain through sarcasm since 2010. Welcome to the official site for bitter cripples (and those who love them). Smart Ass Cripple has been voted World's Biggest Smart Ass by J.D. Power and Associates.

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Saturday, November 15, 2025

Exclusive Treatment

If you are both crippled and native American, it must really suck to be you sometimes. After all, when you hear the word exclusive, you pro...

Tuesday, October 21, 2025

Newsworthiness

There is definitely something to be said for not being absurdly rich and famous. One big benefit that I can think of is that Cosmo will neve...

Wednesday, October 8, 2025

Rude Cripples

It hit me that I could probably get away with being a lot more rude than I already am, just because I’m crippled. Take, for example, that t...

Tuesday, September 30, 2025

Permission to Call me Cripple

If you are a steady reader of my stuff, then, by the power vested in me by me, I hereby give you my blessing to call me cripple. I figure i...

Sunday, September 14, 2025

Why I Never Cheer for Team U.S.A.

I never cheer for Team U.S.A. That’s curious because it’s not like I’m one of those guys who never gets sucked in by sports. I often wish I ...

Sunday, September 7, 2025

Small Town Cripples

It is indeed a very small town, population only about 1,500. But I could sense the presence of cripples all around me because there were bi...

Thursday, August 28, 2025

The Fun Enforcers

The woman ran up to me and said , “ Are you enjoying the park?" I said yes so she said, “Well , that’s good. And you know , we have a ...

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About Me

Smart Ass Cripple: Smart ass cripple (Mike Ervin) is also known as America's Sweetheart.

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