Smart Ass Cripple

Expressing pain through sarcasm since 2010. Welcome to the official site for bitter cripples (and those who love them). Smart Ass Cripple has been voted World's Biggest Smart Ass by J.D. Power and Associates.

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Saturday, December 31, 2022

Only the Most Deserving

There’s a big cardboard box right next to the exit of my local grocery store. On the side of the box is a sign urging everyone to support ...

Tuesday, December 20, 2022

The Great Purge

In this city they recently passed one of those purge laws, just like in the movie. As a result, all laws were suspended for one day and ...

Friday, December 9, 2022

Laughing Gas

Back when I was in college, about 45 years ago, my roommate told me he’d met a couple of guys who had a new and unique way of getting high a...

Wednesday, November 30, 2022

Bingo is Something About us Without us

There’s a saying some cripples use a lot: Nothing About Us Without Us. It means, “The person who decides what I need and want should be ...

Monday, November 21, 2022

That Coveted Captive Cripple Demographic

I’ve never seen a television commercial for a nursing home. I’ve seen commercials for everything from kitchen gadgets to boner pills. And ...

Wednesday, November 9, 2022

At the Mercy of the Court

I was trying get out of paying a parking ticket. So I went to the city facility where hearings about parking tickets are held. First I h...

Sunday, October 30, 2022

A Dog Freaked Out

I was taking a leisurely afternoon stroll around a campground. Coming toward me was a man walking a dog. When the dog saw me he freake...

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About Me

Smart Ass Cripple: Smart ass cripple (Mike Ervin) is also known as America's Sweetheart.

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