I checked out a couple of sites on the internet that sell sex toys. I couldn’t help
myself. I was too curious.
I wondered what kind of sex toy
emergency might arise where someone would absolutely have to have it the next
day. I suppose there could be a scenario where someone has a hot date lined up
and, like a dumbass, they didn’t plan ahead and here it is the night before and
now they have to scramble in order to get everything all lined up.
I imagine expedited shipping of sex
toys is illegal in some states. If so, I’m sure it’s probably states where
there are a lot of tight-ass religious types in charge. The tight-ass religious
types are the ones most freaked out about sex toys. It’s not sex toys per se
that they have such a problem with. It’s fun that freaks them out. Fun
terrifies them. Fun is the devil. And there’s nothing more fun than sex toys.
Having fun is the whole point of sex toys.
I bet if the tight-ass religious
people could have things completely their way, the sale possession of sex toys
would be a felony. But even they must realize the futility of that sort of mandated abstinence. I bet
humans have been playing with sex toys for as long as there have been humans,
or reasonable facsimiles of humans. I bet Neanderthals made sex toys out of found objects, like
pine cones and dead beavers. Playing with sex toys is one of those things like
drinking and dancing. A good number of people will always figure out a way to do it, even
if it’s against the law or mama’s religion. If people can’t buy sex toys on the
free market, they’ll buy back alley sex toys and that can lead to all kinds
of painful consequences, like tongue splinters.
So if the tight-ass religious types
can’t completely ban sex toys, they’ll do like they do when it comes to abortion.
They’ll find ways to limit access every chance they get. Making expedited
shipping of sex toys illegal would be their sneaky little way of instituting a
cooling-off period.
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