Up Close and Personal

I was maneuvering through a corridor of a hospital when I encountered one of those medicine-delivering robots. The robot’s eyes looked like two car headlights to me. The robot and I were on a collision course so I was worried about what might happen next. Because I’ve read stories and seen internet videos where a delivery robot smacks into and tries to flatten and plow right on over a cripple in a wheelchair because for some reason the robot doesn’t sense that there is anybody there. But when this robot got close to me it stopped in its tracks and its lights flashed. And then a heart formed in each of its eyes. And I thought to myself, “Oh shit, this thing must think that I’m another robot! And it’s in love with me! Now what? Is it going to start humping me, like a dog, right here in this hospital corridor ? Won’t that give all of these passersby a helluva story to tell when they go home tonight? Surely one of them will film it with their phone and put it on the internet!” But the robot just sat there looking at me with its lights flashing and hearts in its eyes. And then I saw that one of the passersby was also on a collision course with another medicine-delivering robots, And this guy was a vert (which is what I call people who walk because it’s short for vertical).When the robot encountered the guy it stopped dead in its tracks and its lights flashed. And then a heart formed in each of its eyes. The vert just sidestepped the other robot and went merrily on his way. So I did the same with my robot. And I breathed a sigh of relief.