Thursday, January 6, 2022

Dissuading a Dumbass

 If I'm ever with some dumbass who's about to do something stupid that could render them crippled, like diving into shallow water or doing a handstand on a speeding motorcycle, maybe I ought to just sit back and let them do it.

I've never been in that situation, but what if I am? It's good to role play these things through my head in advance so if it ever does happen I'll be able to react fast.

Most people wouldn't have to think about it for very long. They'd determine right away that the proper thing to do would be to say to the person who's about to do something stupid, "What the hell's the matter with you? Do you want to end up crippled?"

And they're right. Of course the proper response is to do whatever one can to dissuade the dumbass. But I don't think that would be that easy for me to do.

Because I’d feel like it would be like me saying, “Hey, you don’t wanna end up like me, do ya?” And I hate when cripples are made into boogie men like that. That’s why cripple cure campaigns give me the willies because I feel like the idea behind them is to make everybody feel like it’s terrible being crippled and the best thing we can all do about it is to not create anymore cripples.

And I just don’t feel like that about myself or other cripples I know. Being like us isn’t such a terrible thing. There are plenty of reasons why no one would want to be like me, but none of them have to do with being crippled. Those reasons would exist whether I was crippled or not.

I also can’t buy in to the idea that being a cripple is always inferior in every way to being a vert (which is what I call people who walk, because it’s short for vertical). I have a couple of friends who are quads who like to point out that one of the things they like about being a quad is that their friends never ask them to help them move.

So I would have to say to the dumbass who was about to do something stupid, "Hey dumbass, before you do anything stupid, you need to weigh the pros and cons of becoming crippled. On the one hand, your friends won’t ask you help them move and you’ll get much better parking spaces. But on the other hand, being crippled is really expensive because you gotta buy a lot of pricey stuff like wheelchairs and everybody thinks being a cripple is always inferior in every way to being a vert and---"

By that time, the dumbass will have gone and done whatever stupid thing they were going to do.

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