The sessions of Jerry Lewis
Muscular Dystrophy Summer Camp were one week long. The YMCA campgrounds where
the sessions were held wasn’t far away from a shopping mall.
So one year the people who
organized the cripple activities at the camp decided to arrange a Wednesday
field trip to the shopping mall. At first only the crippled older women went.
The guys my age were too cool to go on a crippled old lady’s field trip like
that.
But by the second or third
year we all signed up to go. In fact, just about the whole camp emptied out as
everyone boarded one of the cripple buses and went to the shopping mall. That’s
because word got around that there was a bar in the shopping mall called Beer
& Brat. And so everyone except the crippled old ladies who enjoyed going to
the stores went straight to Beer & Brat and spent the afternoon getting
good and blasted. Apparently Beer & Brat didn’t card us very hard because I
don’t think a lot of us were quite old enough to get good and blasted legally.
At Jerry Lewis Muscular
Dystrophy Summer Camp, every cripple had to be accompanied at all times by our
specially assigned vert (which is what I call people who walk because it’s
short for vertical). And so many of the verts that were with us also got good
and blasted. I remember one of them climbing on top of the juke box and mooning
everybody.
I wonder what the owners of
Beer & Brat made of the annual cripple invasion. They were probably at
least a little freaked out because getting a bunch of cripples good and blasted
surely had to be against the law or something, right? But they should’ve been
happy as hell to see us packing the place because no doubt they made a shitload
of money off of us. And on a Wednesday to boot!
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